Jessica's Journey

  BONE SCAN DAY Today I had my bone scan and CT scan.  I had to be there for my appointment at Jewish around 10:30.  They got me right back and started my IV to inject the radioactive tracer into me.  I had to wait 3 hours for the tracer to absorb into my bones before they could take my images.  Both scans went very well and I was on my way home.  It was a good day.  The worst part is now the waiting.  Waiting for results of the scans.  Everyone keep me in your prayers and pray for clear results on my scans.  

  CHEMOTHERAPY WEEK #2 Today was the second week of my Carbo/Taxol chemotherapy treatment.  In general, everything went as expected.  I was anxious, as always.  The team at Brown Cancer Center is wonderful.  They all helped ease my mind before we began.  First they got labs from me and we had to wait for those to clear.  They gave me pre-meds through my port, which consists of an anti-nausea medication, a steroid, Benadryl, and Pepcid.  I didn't have to have any Keytruda today, as I get that infusion every 3 weeks.  I had a minor hiccup when they started infusing the first chemotherapy drug.  They told me in the beginning to tell them if anything felt strange or different once we began.  I started feeling very hot in my head and neck and my heart rate began to climb.  I got my nurse and immediately she, along with three other nurses, came to my side.  They stopped the medication and took my vitals.  They watched me fo...

CHEMOTHERAPY DAY 1 Today was my first day of chemo.  I've been so anxious about this appointment because I didn't know how my body would react to it.  Luckily they gave lots of pre-medications.  I was given a very strong anti-nausea medication through my port, as well as a steroid and a strong dose of Benadryl.  The Benadryl caused me to feel very sleepy.  This actually helped with my anxiety.  Today begins a 12 week treatment with two different chemo drugs, along with Keytruda.  I'll be on Keytruda every 3 weeks for the next year for my immunotherapy.  I will be coming for treatment oncer per week for the first 12 weeks.  After the 12 weeks, I will have an additional 8 weeks of chemotherapy.  The second half of my chemo treatment contains the Red Devil, also known as Doxorubicin.  I will likely begin losing my hair within the next few weeks of my current treatment.  I'm ok with that.  I'll do anything in order to beat thi...

 LOOK FOR GUIDANCE Today's affirmation says to look for guidance.  I've been so anxious all day, waiting by the phone to hear about finalizing my treatment plan.  I have prayed all day for someone to reach out to me and let me know something.  Finally, around 5PM, I received my guidance!  My oncologist called to talk to me.  I owe that phone call to the Lord because I have prayed so hard today for answers.  Originally my plan was to first have my mastectomy followed by chemotherapy.  However, since my tumor has doubled in size, he wants me to do chemotherapy first, followed by surgery second.  I will be undergoing five months of aggressive chemotherapy, beginning next week.  I'm extremely nervous, but at the same time ready to get this going.  I feel like there has been a lot of appointments I've had to go through in order to reach this point.  But I'm glad it is here.  It's go time!  I will be given two chemo drugs o...

 RECONSTRUCTIVE SURGERY CONSULTATION Before I talk about today, I have to mention my setback from yesterday.  I received the results of my MRI and my mass has doubled in size.  There are also two new masses in my left breast.  I had a rough day emotionally dealing with that news.  The sooner I can get surgery scheduled the better. I have decided on a double mastectomy due to the high risk of triple negative breast cancer returning.  I feel like it's the right decision.   Today I met with the plastic surgeon who will be reconstructing my breasts after my mastectomy.  I won't go into too much detail, but it was a good visit and I received a lot of information.  It was the last appointment to check off my list prior to setting up surgery.  I will talk with my oncology surgeon tomorrow to find out my surgery date.  Hopefully it can be as soon as next week.  Keep praying for everything to go smoothly as I go through each step i...

   HAVING A LITTLE FUN WITH ONE OF MY NEW WIGS!   The tough realization I have to face...I have cancer, I will be starting chemotherapy and that means that hair loss will likely happen.  Some people might not think about how important their hair is until they face losing it.  A lot of people with cancer report losing their hair as one of the side effects they fear most as they face cancer treatment.  I'm not one of those people.  Of course it saddens me to lose my hair but, to me, it's temporary and there are so many options out there to replace hair.  I'm a former cosmetologist and hair has been a big part of my world for approximately 25 years now.  I know wigs can be a fun way to express myself.  I'm sure there will be an emotional response I'll go through when it happens.  I'll experience a wide range of feelings but I'm prepared for that. People dealing with this need to understand that it isn't selfish or vain to be angry...

 MRI Day! Well, today was my MRI with contrast.  The oncology surgeon and radiologist wanted me to have this scan to help determine my surgery treatment.  They want to be sure nothing was missed in my right breast.  This will likely determine if I will have a single or double mastectomy.  I have been extremely anxious about this particular appointment for some reason.  I've been worried about having to lay on my stomach, which means laying on my chemo port.  The port is still fresh and still hurts so I was nervous about putting pressure on it for an extended period of time.  I also have an allergy to CT contrast so I was very nervous about having another reaction to the contrast today.  They assured me that it was two separate contrasts.  The table for the MRI was extremely uncomfortable and I didn't know how I was going to make it through 30-45 min of not moving.  I had to change my mindset while I was in the machine from anxious t...

  BE PATIENT WITH WINTER Today's affirmation has more than one meaning to me.  I've had to be patient with more than just winter.  FIRST, it talks about winter being a time to slow down and enjoy our homes and ourselves.  We need to enjoy the cozy feeling of socks, of blankets and sweaters and hot beverages.  Today was the perfect day to find joy in the cold, both indoors and out.  The kids have had a blast sledding outside today.  It has also been a great day for napping and movies.  I'm a summer girl through and through, but I can appreciate the beauty of winter.  I'm getting better at being patient with winter.  I used to wish it away as soon as it began.  However, it's good for all of us to find ways to enjoy all the seasons, even the frigid ones.   SECOND, I was supposed to have my port placement surgery follow-up today.  The weather caused the office to close, which cancelled all the appointments for the day....

 Give yourself permission to pause! Today's affirmation made me realize we all need to take moments to pause.  With the hustle and bustle of the holidays now over, it was a nice day to relax and soak up the stillness.  Do you have things that make you happy?  I'm talking small, sometimes silly things...I do.  Today I was able to enjoy some of the little things that make me happy.  For example, I love the comfort of my bedroom.  It's my peaceful, calm place.  Looking around at all my personal things makes me feel content.   \ I received the final piece to my tiny, bedroom office space today...my chair.  Its so comfortable!   All the little things that give me comfort when I look around.  Surround yourself with things that bring good vibes! Always make your bed as soon as you wake up.  It's a great way to feel accomplished first thing in the morning...and you get to enjoy how your space feels! I love being wrapped ...

New Year, New Resolutions! Feel it on the first!  Perform a self breast exam today!  What better day of the month to start your regular self examinations.  It can save your life!